Give her a = piece of your mind

Give her a piece of your mind

Mindfulness sessions with a Guelph = expert are=20 being touted as an intelligent, in-the-moment way to heal both mind and = body

JOANNE SHUTTLEWORTH

DAVE=20 CARTER, GUELPH = MERCURY =

Guelph=20 psychotherapist Barbara Wilkinson says mindfulness isn't a = quick fix=20 but rather a way to live in the here and now -- and in so = doing,=20 give your restless mind a break from the anxious thoughts, = fears and=20 stresses of yesterday and tomorrow.

GUELPH (Jan=20 27, 2006)

When Darlene Mathieu looks at herself in the mirror, she now sees a = woman=20 with a plan, with skills and who, at the heart of it all, is content = with=20 herself and her life.

That's a far cry from where the 47-year-old was two years ago. Anemic = from=20 not eating properly and so overcome with depression she could hardly get = out of=20 bed, Mathieu was a train wreck waiting to happen.

"Seriously, two years ago, if you saw me, you'd say 'Oh my God, that = girl is=20 a nervous wreck,' " the Guelph woman said.

But after practising something called=20 "mindfulness'' for almost a year, Mathieu says she's invigorated. She's=20 ambitious, has energy again and, perhaps most importantly, feels she's back in the driver's seat of her = life.

"It's powerful," she said. "I didn't have much faith in it at first = but once=20 I tried it, well, I'm encouraging everyone I know to go."

Mathieu's transformation didn't come from a make-up bottle, a = wardrobe=20 overhaul or a new hairstyle but rather from some serious self-reflection = and an=20 attitude adjustment.

And that happened after she started attending mindfulness sessions = with=20 Barbara Wilkinson, a psychotherapist who practises in=20 Guelph.

"Mindfulness is not a quick fix. It's about slowing down and paying = attention=20 to what you're doing," she said. "It's about being where we are when = we're=20 there."

That may sound like psycho-babble to some, magic to others, but a = growing=20 body of research suggests that when we take care of our minds, our = bodies are=20 better able to heal. And when we take care of our bodies, our minds are = in=20 better shape to cope with the stresses of day-to-day living.

Alexandra Gousse is a doctoral student at = the=20 University of=20 Guelph who's been = researching=20 mindfulness and how it relates to physical health and behaviour. It comes from the Buddhist tradition of = meditation and is gaining momentum as an addition to treatment programs = for=20 those suffering from depression, anger, stress and chronic pain among = other=20 ailments.

"Humans have highly specialized minds. We're very good at looking at = our past=20 and reviewing our memories. And we're good at looking to the future or=20 anticipating events. What we're not so good at is being present in the = here and=20 now," Gousse said.

She offered the example of a person who is grieving. They feel sad, = but they=20 don't like feeling sad. So instead they clean the house, run errands, = put in=20 extra time at work and generally keep themselves so occupied that the = feelings=20 of sadness go away.

But they never go away completely, Gousse = said. A=20 sad person may become irritable and may have trouble sleeping and = concentrating.=20 They may put off paying the bills, which then pile up and create debt. = And so=20 on.

With mindfulness, the individual zeroes in on those emotions and yes, = they=20 feel sad. "But when you're in the moment, you know it won't last. Your = day will=20 go on, your life will go on. There's hope," = Gousse said. "If you live your life only with an = eye to the=20 future, or only with an eye to the past, you're missing out."

Wilkinson was working in Vienna in the 1980s when she learned = she had=20 cervical cancer. She went the medical route and took all the orthodox = treatments=20 but also started practising mindfulness with = a=20 therapist. She has been cancer-free since 1990.

"I was aware of my body healing," Wilkinson said. "I could feel the = heat of=20 my blood coursing through my body. It was the most incredible = experience. I knew=20 I was creating the conditions for healing."

As she mastered it for herself, she began incorporating mindfulness = into the=20 classroom, where she worked with children with special needs.

Mindfulness is like meditation in that you slow down and focus on = your=20 breathing. By putting your mind through the paces -- Wilkinson has tapes = to help=20 those new to the concept -- and turning your mind's eye to your breath, = your=20 lungs, your heart beating and your muscles relaxing, the health benefits = begin=20 to compound.

Wilkinson got her masters degree in counselling=20 while in Europe and continued to = incorporate=20 mindfulness into her private practice.

In February she'll begin sessions on mindful eating for healthy = weight loss.=20 "It's not so much about weight loss as examining why you eat," Wilkinson = said.

"Eating is so often about comfort or about hiding anger.

Wilkinson said that on particularly stressful days she has to remind = herself=20 to step out of the frenzy and clear her head, even if only for a minute = or=20 two.

Mathieu describes it as "cleaning out the junk drawer in your head," = instead=20 of stuffing it with facts, fears, emotions and stress.

Visit barbarawilkinson@sympatico.= ca or=20 call 824-9831 for more details.

jshuttleworth@guelphmercu= ry.com